Skip to main content

What's It Like?

"What's it like to have a grandchild with Down syndrome?"  "Will he be able to go to 'regular' school?"  "Will he ever talk?"  "Does he know who you are?"  And the first comment many people say when they first hear of Wes's diagnosis: "Oh.  I"m sorry."

These are all perfectly legitimate questions and comments that I've heard over the past two years.  I take all of them as a way that people show they are interested and caring.  But I'd like to clarify and explain some things about our little guy.

First and foremost, the diagnosis of Down syndrome is not a curse or something to be sorry about.  Honest.  Wes has developmental delays - not developmental lack of abilities.  There is a big difference.  And just so you know...he is very, very smart.  We were just there over the holidays and his communication skills blew me away.  No, he's not talking audibly yet at two years four months.  But he is communicating!   Wes knows over 50 signs, but lots of children his age know signs.  What impresses me so much is that he actually uses those signs to communicate...as opposed to just imitating or displaying a sign when asked.  He will ask for water when he's thirsty, ask for a pbj sandwich by signing "eat sandwich" when he's hungry, tell you "all done" when he doesn't like the song you're singing, and ask for music by signing music at me (I'm supposed to sing), or pointing to the DVD player or stereo.  He communicates.  He even came up with this little game where he signs, "Night-night, close the door."  Meaning?  Leave the room, close the door, wait a few minutes, then go back in and say, "Good morning!"  This is OMG cute!

Wes's comprehensive vocabulary is at or above that of typical children his age.  ("Typical" here means children without the diagnoses of Down syndrome.)  I ask him if he wants to play a word game, and he gets excited.  I can then say, "Where is the table?" "Where is the clock?"  Where does Malin live?" and he knows exactly what I'm saying and the answer to each question.  He shows me by pointing.  He can tell us that he wants to visit the neighbors who have a gold fish pond by signing "fish" and pointing outside.  Amazing!

To top it off, Wes knows exactly what he wants and doesn't want.  If he wants music, you better pick songs he likes, because otherwise you will get the "All done" sign over and over.  And his favorite?  The Beatles.  He created his own sign for the Beatles and asks for them regularly.  We have no clue where he got this sign, but he is consistent with its use.  He knows all the motions to many children's songs that he's learned at his weekly music class.  He doesn't like Face Time and tries to "swipe" to the next people when we try.  He loves looking at pictures in anybody's phone and will swipe really fast on the ones he doesn't care for.  And he positively loves books!  He actually knows the words for frequently read books and can sign words for upcoming pages right before you get to that page.

Does this sound like a child who is lacking in ability?  No.  Not to me either.  So, will he ever talk?  Sure, in his own time...probably around age 3.  Will he go to "regular" school?  Of course!  He will be evaluated and have an IEP (Individual Education Plan) written for him taking advantage of his strengths and weaknesses.  It's called "inclusion."  He will spend at least part of his school day in a classroom with typical children (see my last post) and part, probably, with educational specialists working on his weaker skills.  Does he know who we are?  Heck, yes!  What's it like to have a grandchild with Down syndrome?  It is amazing beyond description.  His communication cues are subtle; his milestones are huge; his capabilities are endless; and his emotional intelligence will far exceed yours or mine.  I can't imagine having him any other way.

Comments

  1. And when you ask him where is Grampa he points at me! :)

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Expanding Our World

Last night after two long days of traveling, I connived my husband into watching "So You Think You Can Dance" with me.  It's one of my guilty pleasures.  If you've never seen it, there are some really spectacular dancers who show up to audition.  Three judges decide whether the audition is worthy of a trip to Las Vegas for further auditioning.  I find it to be fairly authentic and serious, as opposed to American Idol (which I still watch, BTW) which is often ridiculous and "fake."  Anyway, one of the last dancers to take the stage was a young man named Cody.  Cody has Down syndrome, according to his mom who was sitting in the audience.  It's the first time I've seen a person with Down syndrome audition for any of these kinds of shows.  Cody has some fairly serious speech difficulties, but was able to introduce himself and explain what he was there for--to audition with a hip-hop piece.  He then said that the reason he came was that he was a f...

Things I Am Afraid Of

There are some things I am afraid of right now.  First and foremost is writing this entry about scary things because some of these things I don't want to say out loud or write.  But I'm going to because I think they might hit home with other people, too.  I've always had a sort of life mantra of "Do something scary every day."  This is my scary thing today--writing about the things I'm afraid of.  Here goes. I'm afraid of not knowing what kind of Down syndrome Baby J. has.  What if it's very severe?  Can I handle that?  I know the answer, but I'm still afraid. I'm afraid that I might cry when he's born.  Oh, my gosh!  Of course I will cry!  And I think they will be tears of joy, but I'm still afraid.  What if my face shows shock or something similar?  I adore this baby already, but I'm still afraid something scary might sneak out of my face at the wrong time. I know he's going to be adorable.  I mean, he's got Ja...